NY: Support & Skepticism

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Sunny but brisk

No coffee yet, but bring it on!

It is day 3 of our campaign to raise money to help get us a second store front in NYC. While I’m trying to keep this adventure in the forefront of my mind, it is December 22nd after all, and competing thoughts of last minute gifts, last minute hats needing to be ready by Christmas, packing for the 4 nights I’ll be gone for Christmas, and duties from my other jobs, keep pushing and shoving NY out of the way. The Holiday season is notorious for inspiring people to say yes to everything, to double and triple book their days, to do way too much than their human frames are capable of.

Well, yesterday, my human frame freaked out a bit. With everything piled upon everything and threatening to topple, I may have panicked a bit. Now I pride myself on being a very stable, dependable source of confidence in all endeavors, so this all felt a bit foreign to me. What to do, how to get back on my feet and feel confident again? 1) breathe, 2) complete one simple task at a time, 3) know that when I wake up in the morning everything will feel normal again, 4) confess my fears, doubts, and weight of everything to someone 5) work until I can’t work anymore.

So, what did I do? All of those things. For while a lot of people support us in this endeavor and believe that we can do it, there are definitely those who have come forward and have a lot of skepticism and in short, think we’re crazy. I felt so stuck in the middle between this dichotomy of support and skepticism that I felt like my arms were going to be ripped off.

All of what everyone has been saying is valid and good for us to hear, but all I really needed to hear was from my fellow Pauls, who confirmed and reassured my torn feelings by saying aloud that yes, we are crazy. Yes we do too much at times, yes, we make a big mess in our workshop but it always gets cleaned up, and yes, a lot of people won’t understand this or know how to react, and all of this is really a bunch of repeat feelings everyone, including us, has already felt when we first decided to buy a hat shop 2.5 years ago.

Ahhhhh. Ok. Than it’s ok that I feel a little bonkers.

And it’s ok that you feel a little bonkers.

But we’re going to do it, we’re going to open a store in NYC.

~ Paul 1